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Thinkin' about Father's Day

6/17/2012

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It's funny how Father's Day can change for a girl once she becomes a mom and has a man in her life who is the father of her child (or children).  Growing up, Father's Day always felt like it was about being with family and spending quality time - focused time - together, and the cards, the gifts, and the occasional "alligator" pastry were just trivial (yet appreciated!) perks. 

Somehow I always felt like the men we were celebrating - Daddy, Grandpa Sol, Grandpa Sam, and even my uncles - were also somehow there because they wanted to celebrate their time with us too.  They made us feel so loved.  I wonder if we did the same for them.  I hope so.

And I'll just put it out there that my dad is pretty awesome too and I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for his patience, encouragement, love, and just general support throughout my life.  I think my dad set the perfect example for the nurturing qualities I should look for in the man who would become the father of my child - of my children, God willing.

Just as I hope that my father has felt appreciated over the years I'm sitting here thinking (while my hubby and daughter take a Father's Day nap)  about how lucky I feel to have such an amazing man as the father of my daughter, and wondering if there's any way to truly let my husband know how much I appreciate everything he does and the way in which he interacts with Daliya. 

I can't tell you how much I love overhearing him talk to her, be loving when she needs love, be silly when she's open to giggles and creativity, and even the way he says things to her like "I love your poopies... and I'm glad they're in the potty!"  Seriously though, how could I not enjoy overhearing comments like that?! (And who would have ever dreamed of their husband saying these hilarious and adorable things until actually having a little one to say them to!?!)


I'd love to hear from you 1) something cute or silly you've overheard your child's dad say to your little one, and 2) something special you did for Father's Day today that you all enjoyed or that really showed your appreciation for your man.  Maybe we can all enjoy each others' stories and get some fun ideas from each other for planning random "thank you" or family days. 

Even if you're pregnant and don't have any little ones around yet, my guess is you still either gave your partner a gift or at least made Father's Day special in some tiny way like talking about your future together as parents and dreaming about what this time next year might be like.  Either way, please leave a comment below - I'd love to hear from you!  

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The Nurturing Daddy

5/9/2012

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Greetings, my name is Jordan Gerson and I am Becky’s husband.  From time to time a blog post by me will be featured on the www.nurturedmommy.com blog site where I will share stories, experiences and tips that I have encountered or discovered during my role as a nurturing daddy.  For today’s post, I thought I would share what I experienced when we found out we would be becoming parents. 

I remember sitting in my school’s library working on finals when I got a call from Becky.  She was somewhat anxious because she had yet to get her period and thought she might be pregnant.  Now, this was nothing new.  There were often months where Becky was convinced that there was going to be a little Gerson on the way for at least a few hours.  The routine was almost always the same:

Becky:  “Do you think I could be pregnant?”

Me: “I don’t know.  Maybe.”

Becky: “I felt something right here a couple of days ago (points to someplace on her abdomen), I wonder if that was the egg implanting. What do you think?”

Me: “What the heck do I know?!?  I don’t have a uterus!  If you think you might be pregnant, let's get a pregnancy test.”

I would then get a pregnancy test, and sometimes run out for a second but soon enough things would start flowing and the visions of breastfeeding and burping would fade from our thoughts. 

This time when she called she said that things felt different than usual.  So I said, “well maybe you're pregnant, I’ll get a test on the way home.”  Becky wasn’t convinced but humored me and agreed to take a pregnancy test.

I walked in the door and handed her the test.  Becky took the stick in hand and headed into our teeny tiny bathroom.  When she finished going, she opened the door and handed me the test to read the results.  You know how when you watch on a television show or when someone is pregnant and you have to wait and wait and wait for the 3 minutes to be over so you can read the test.  Yeah well, not the case here.  As soon as the test entered my hand, the plus showed up immediately and two words entered my mind “Oh s&^%!!”

It was absolutely the happiest moment in my life to that point and the most terrifying.  Of course the only emotion I let my wife see was my sheer joy but my mind was racing with questions.  Were we ready for this?  How would this affect our marriage?  What is Becky’s pregnancy going to be like? Am I going to have to clean up poop all the time once we have a baby?  Will I still have time to rock out with my friends on Beatles Rock Band for the Wii?  The answer to the last two questions was “Yes” and “No” respectively.

My time to dwell on these questions was limited because my role as nurturing daddy had already begun and as it turned out Becky’s mind was also racing with questions and some doubts and that, coupled with the fact that all this was going on in her body, trumped my concern of dealing with poopy diapers and mastering Sergeant Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band.  It was my job to reassure her that having a baby was a blessing, that this is what we wanted and that everything was going to be ok. 

Being the partner of a pregnant woman is not an easy job, but it is more than worthwhile.  Being actively involved in my wife’s pregnancy gave me the feeling of being connected to her and my little player to be named later.  By feeding my wife, I knew I was helping to give nutrition to our little jelly bean. 

Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty of times I wanted to pull my hair out, but being a nurturing daddy is a job I can’t wait to take on again (but first let me get in a few sessions of Beatles Rock Band).

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    Becky Gerson

    Creator of Nurtured Mommy. Doula. HypnoBirthing Childbirth Educator.
    Breastfeeding advocate.
    Aspiring midwife. Holistic mama. Rabbi's wife.

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Becky Gerson, CD(DONA), HBCE:  HypnoBirthing Childbirth Educator. Doula. Aspiring midwife. Breastfeeding advocate. Holistic mama.