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Have you thought about doing EC with your baby?

5/6/2012

8 Comments

 
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Elimination communication is what a lot of people call early potty training.  But to someone who actually does EC with their child, it is more of a way of communicating, as the name implies, and not having to go through traditional potty "training" later on.  For people who decide to try it with their newborn, it is also a way of keeping their baby from getting comfortable with being wet or poopy and just hanging out that way. 

EC involves learning your baby's cues that tell you she needs to go potty.  You also offer the potty often, especially when your little one has just woken up, and make a "pssssss" sound as she goes, so that she will make the association between the sound and eliminating.  My daughter, at 16 months now, says "psssss" when she wants to tell us either that she needs to go potty or she is going in her diaper and wants a dry one put on.  She also uses the same sound when she needs to poop.

My husband and I had talked about doing EC during my pregnancy and decided we would give it a try and see how it would go, but agreed with each other that we didn't want to be too "hard core" about it.  When Daliya was a week old we started holding her over her little potty that we kept on the bathroom counter whenever we would take her diaper off to change her.  We had the changing table set up right outside the bathroom and our bedroom to make it really easy.  That first day she peed on the potty 5 times!  We couldn't believe how easy it was! 

As time went on, offering the potty just became a routine for all 3 of us, and was even a fun time to play and sing and talk about the fact that "pee pees and poopies go in the potty."  Probably somewhere around 4 months old Daliya started to really get a kick out of peeing or pooping on the potty.  Don't get me wrong, there have been and still are plenty of times that she doesn't want to sit on the potty, and we don't push her to do it.  But the majority of the time it is a satisfying experience for all involved.  I can't even tell you how excited out babysitters have been to take a little baby to the potty when she tells them she needs to go.  And our parents, who definitely thought we were a little out of our minds to try EC in the first place, are now big believers and tell all their friends.  I think once people see that we don't put a lot of pressure on Daliya to go on the potty, but we offer and often she is the one to let us know that she wants to go, they are much more comfortable with the idea and even excited about it.

It also makes for a lot less dirty diapers, and very very rarely have we had a diaper leak when she was sleeping.  For the last few months Daliya has rarely peed in her diaper when she is sleeping.  It amazes me that she can go 12 to 13 hours with a dry diaper and no longer even asks to go potty during the night.  She still usually nurses before bed around 7:30 or 8pm, before I go to bed around midnight, and then again in the early morning - maybe around 4am, but keeps sleeping until somewhere between 7:30 and 8:30am.  When she sits on the potty in the morning once she is up for the day I'm still always amazed at how much pee is in the potty.  Her bladder has seriously gotten used to holding a lot of urine until she is ready to get up and go in the morning!  Daliya will even tell us when she needs to pee during her bath.  She'll get out, pee on the potty, and get back in.  I love not having to worry about her peeing or pooping in the bath anymore! 

Now, I just have to say that Daliya is not peeing and pooping on the potty 100% of the time - which is totally fine with us because the point of EC is not being fully potty trained as soon as they possibly can be.  It is really more about getting comfortable with the potty and letting her body dictate when she needs to eliminate, while simultaneously learning to wait for her to be sitting on a potty.  I'll be honest, I tend to just have her go in her diaper when we are out and about because it is easier for me than taking a potty along that we have to clean out each time she uses it in the car. 

She also goes through "potty pauses" where she won't want to use the potty hardly at all for a week or two.  These "potty pauses" tend to coincide with developmental milestones, like when she started crawling, when she started cruising, and then when she started walking.  The other "potty pauses" have tended to be after we've traveled to see out of town family, and then come home to her not wanting to use the potty for a few days to a few weeks.  

EC can be different for each family and you can pick and choose what works for you and your baby - just like anything else you do as a parent.  Just know that any amount of EC, even if it is part time, can be a fun and positive thing - it doesn't have to be stressful because there is no pressure to be "done potty training" by a certain time or age.  It just happens so much more organically, and you can literally see the feeling of satisfaction and empowerment on your little ones face when she goes on the potty.  My daughter also obviously loves that we understand her when she needs to go or when she is wet, even though she isn't even talking yet!  I think it makes her feel heard and that her needs and comforts are taken into consideration and respected.

If you have any questions about EC, feel free to post below.  Or if you've done EC with your baby, then your story is also more than welcome if you'd like to share! 

8 Comments
Joan Durham link
5/6/2012 11:53:35 am

Thanks for this clear & personal explanation of your experience with EC. Love it (and you & Daliyah!)

Reply
audrey
5/8/2013 02:01:08 am

Hey Becky,

Found your website, i love it! We're also EC'ing, Tehila is now 8 months and we started when she was around 3 months (i needed a little "push" to get started). She also is comfortable most of the time peeing and pooping on the potty, but i'm not sure we're at the stage yet where she "lets me know," I just have to pay attention. Or, I'll get lucky with the poops when she's on the potty anyway at a regular time that I would take her. What age did that happen for you where she started communicating, and how does she communicate with you? How old is your daughter?

Reply
Becky link
5/8/2013 06:26:40 am

Hey Audrey!

That's awesome that you guys do EC too! I don't think Daliya started actually telling us she had to go (by saying "pssss") until she was over a year old. I honestly don't remember the exact timeline though. She is almost 2 and a half already and has been completely out of diapers since her birthday. Her diaper was dry most of the time for a while before that, but I was hesitant to take her out of diapers because I didn't want to be cleaning up the occasional mess in the car or away from the house. At home though she was diaper free for quite a while before that and she would go on the potty very consistently.

These days she still has accidents about once a month, and for a while she would always have an accident at a particular friend's house. I don't know what that was about, but she is past it now. And I figure having an accident every so often really isn't a big deal. It usually happens at home now anyway when she is busy playing and not wanting to take a potty break!

It's a wild ride watching our kids grow and develop at their own pace, isn't it? :)

Reply
Becky link
5/8/2013 06:30:51 am

I just realized I didn't answer your whole question Audrey. Now she just tells us by saying pee pee or poopy. It's a whole different ballgame now that she talks (and talks and talks and talks)! :)

Reply
audrey
5/8/2013 06:50:02 am

I also forgot to ask about night. She's still breastfeeding once a night (any input on sleeping through the night?) and when she wakes up for that, i take her to the potty when i change her then. But she's usually soaked already (even though she has more for the potty) so I'm wondering when Daliyah started staying dry at night and what you did to promote that

Reply
Becky link
5/8/2013 07:50:00 am

Do you take her potty before or after you nurse? We got into the habit of taking Daliya potty as part of her bedtime routine so that she was going to sleep with an empty bladder. Then as soon as she woke up or even really stirred/partially woke up we would take her again - before nursing, even if that made her really mad (she would scream on the potty cuz she wanted to nurse first). We'd only do this the first time she woke up to nurse during the night. Then after a while decided to see what would happen if we stopped - especially since it made her so mad! Well, she just didn't pee in her diaper at night anymore, even when she was still waking up to nurse. Night weaning is a whole different issue, but I would say if she is only waking up once and you are fine with that, just go with the flow. If you are having a hard time with it, then let's talk.

audrey
5/8/2013 07:39:26 pm

Yeah as far as night, I do take her to the potty before she goes to sleep, BUT she nurses to sleep at night, so she goes to sleep with a full bladder anyway so i'm not sure what i can do about that. And then in middle of the night I potty her after finishing eating on one side before she starts the other because if i do it when she's done eating, then she totally wakes up and wants to play

Reply
Becky link
5/11/2013 09:54:04 pm

I wouldn't worry about her nursing to sleep. I think as she eats more and more solid foods in the evening she'll probably continue to nurse to sleep but need to drink less at that time, so her bladder won't always be so full at night. When I was starting to think about night weaning we started giving Daliya dinner right before our bedtime routine, figuring her tummy would stay full longer and she wouldn't want to nurse for as long before bed because her tummy was already full.

I would try taking Tehila to the potty as soon as she wakes up at night, before you nurse on the first side. She may even be waking up because she needs to potty, not because she's really hungry in the middle of the night. It's hard to know. But you may find that if she learns that you are going to take her potty as soon as she wakes up even before she can nurse, that she will start holding it until she's on the potty.

Let me know what you try and what works or doesn't work. :)

And Happy Mother's Day!!!

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    Creator of Nurtured Mommy. Doula. HypnoBirthing Childbirth Educator.
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Becky Gerson, CD(DONA), HBCE:  HypnoBirthing Childbirth Educator. Doula. Aspiring midwife. Breastfeeding advocate. Holistic mama.